marissa

marissa

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Frivolous Finds: First Installment

One of the luxuries of adulthood is the ability to spend money on absolutely pointless/unnecessary things without the need of any justification. Here are a few of those things...


Fruit Jackets

An avid fruit eater myself, I cannot think of a better way to eat fruit on the go! Who needs Tupperware or Ziplocs when your produce can have its very own fruit jacket! It helps ward off bruising and nicks and may even help your children be the coolest kids in the cafeteria!
$27.95
http://www.neatoshop.com/product/Fruit-Jacket-Apple-Banana-and-Pear-Trio

Stunners of the Month

We all want to be that guy in the club or gym who wears his sunglasses at night.  We desire to see things differently than others and add a sense of anonymity to our existence, right? We want to beef up our coolness ratings and let others know that we are either partying way too hard or maybe hiding our pink eye. Good news, every month you can have a new pair of stunner shades for only $9 a month with a Stunner of the Month membership! Mailed directly to your home, or Club Space, wherever you primarily reside, a hot pair of  trendy shades will surely aim to please. "Expect to be transformed by the personality and attitude that accompanies each pair."

Hamburger Bed

BEST.BED.EVER.
http://www.hamburgerbed.com/


Darkfin Gloves
Am I alone when I confess that a childhood dream of mine was to swim like a fish?! Well, whatever, whether you're a swimmer, a rafter, or a wanna-be Aqua Man, Darkfin Gloves give you the ultimate aquatic experience.  One product reviewer even stated that his dream was to be Michael Phelps so he purchased the gloves and then a bong. Respect. 
$24.95


POP Phone
Did we all see the picture of Lenny Kravitz with his POP Phone headset? Eradicating the need for the convenient and comfortable BlueTooth headset, this POP headset, is a bulky, uncomfortable, awkward, vintage-inspired headset for your mobile device. Purchase one today and receive dial-up internet  and rabbit ear antennae as complimentary gifts. Wait! Purchase one within the next five minutes and they will quadruple the offer and include the station wagon from Adventures in Babysitting!
$29.90
http://www.nativeunion.com/us/wiredproducts/popphone.html

Star Trek Pizza Cutter
I'm starting to realize that by writing a blog, I am totally putting myself out there at the mercy of everyone's criticism, judgments, and  personal entertainment. At the end of the day, I don't really care what you think and I merely write to humor and inform my readers. Here goes..
I was a huge Trekkie as a kid.
 No but really, ask my family. I was obsessed with Star Trek: The Next Generation, purchased the memorabilia from the Smithsonian, got my mom to make a custom made Deanna Troi Halloween costume, am the owner of the Star Trek encyclopedia, and so forth. I could not help but be tickled by this pizza cutter. It's the enterprise! No, I won't buy it, my Trekkie days are over. I've moved on to more valuable obsessions like Silly Bandz, especially the Kardashian-inspired ones. Poor Khloe got the chubby outline :(
$29.99
http://www.thinkgeek.com/homeoffice/kitchen/dea2/

Like/Dislike Stamps
I think the success of any business or workplace is dependent upon its simplicity. Keep things easy, understandable, and clear and there will be less room for error or Madoff scandals. These stamps, clearly inspired by a certain networking website, get straight to the point and tell them how you really feel. They are self-inking spreaders of joy or misery.
$14.00
http://www.urbanoutfitters.com/

LED Pacifier
So 99.9% of my friends are all having babies. It's a lot of pressure, finding that perfect gift that is cute, original, and sentimental. It can also get expensive. I love Shutterfly book albums  but those are for the special babies. They can also get pricey as well. So when I'm balling on a budget I seek out more practical and inexpensive gifts. Presenting the LED Pacifier! Promotes safety by allowing you to see your child in the dark so that you will never lose them again. Also infuses your old partying lifestyle into your baby because it is said to be "like having a rave in your crib". Cue the Kaskade lullaby tracks.
$2.99

Cloud Room

Basically as stated in the name, this is a cloud room. Some call it a portable "meeting" room, whatever that may be. Made of rip resistant nylon, it inflates in less than three minutes and folds nicely into a storage bag after use. Oh, and it's only $9,699.00. No big deal.
http://www.gnr8.biz/product_info.php?products_id=81



Fear the Beard

We all have that one friend who cannot grow out his beard. It either turns into Spencer Pratt's peachfuzz of a mess or Consuelo, our housekeeper, outdoes him with her extensive collection of chinhairs. Bring on the beard shirt. Make your friend feel better by allowing him to experience the bounty of facial hair. This shirt can also be used as a clever disguise and comes in various beard types. Check out their other products too!
$19.99

Look Ma, No Hands

During my 3 month stint interning at the United Nations in New York City, I suffered many traumatic experiences as an inexperienced urban commuter. Running to the subway in 95 degree heat, wearing high heels (never got the "wear sneakers on the way" memo), avoiding creeps, and making it to my office on time without looking like a freaking disaster, was all surely detrimental to my mental and physical health. NOW... add pouring rain into the mix and I suffered the greatest panic attacks of my life. How the hell is one supposed to walk fast, with bags in hand, your Metrocard stuffed in your bra, breakfast stuffed under your armpit AND able to maneuver an umbrella through the masses?!
Allow me to introduce the umbrella backpack.If I had only known about this sooner! I would surely be the stylish talk of the town, especially if I had a tackily monogrammed Coach or Louis Vuitton umbrella. Fierce.
$39.95
http://www.hammacher.com/


Toe Opener

Let me state the obvious. Public restrooms are the devil. Every move or tangible contact you make inside a public restroom is horrifying and we can't help but think to ourselves that we are destroying our bodies and blood count just by being in there. You manage to hover over the toilet seat, flush with your foot, use your elbow to wash your hands, etc. but then comes the exit. Your heart weighs heavy and you take a 5.7 second examination of the door and try to make an escape plan that will constitute the least amount of physical contact. Sometimes we awkwardly kill time and let the person in front of us open the door. Or we shimmy our bulky elbow to open the usually retarded door handles. Some of us gather paper towels or our shirt in order to merely grab the handle because we wouldn't have it any other way. Why can't all public restrooms just have 2 way doors? Sure there will be a lot of door-to-face collisions, but we would rather have our face smack into it than our hands, am I right? 
Fear not my friends. They are now implementing toe door openers in public venues! I love it. Functional for us hands-free fans, but maybe not so much for the stumbling drunk girls who should've worn flats if they knew they would be drinking so much. Poor planning.
http://www.toepener.com/

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